Faith in G.O.D.

All my life, it’s been a dream of mine to become a traditionally published author. I even had two favourite publishing houses and a literary agent picked out as my preferred choices of representation. I knew it would take a lot of hard work, which I gladly and diligently supplied, and some talent, which I believed and had been told I possessed. But I had absolutely no control over the amount of luck it would take, and a pretty poor production record in previous attempts to make my own.

We’ve all heard the stories of even the best and most famous writers suffering continual humiliation and ignorance before their eventual breakthrough. The chances of the right person picking up your manuscript from a slush pile of thousands are slim, and the odds of them being bowled over by it within the permitted three chapter submission even slimmer, especially when you’ve written a book as odd as mine. It’s complicated, it doesn’t fit into any current literary trends, and it’s not for everyone. After a year or so of entering competitions and submitting to agents, I got sick of all the months of waiting around, relying on other people, only to receive another unexplained rejection at the end of it. Especially as it didn’t necessarily mean my book was bad – it just meant they didn’t think it would sell, because sadly money is the be all and end all of artistic endeavour in the cynical modern world.

I never cared about the profit, I just wanted an audience. I wouldn’t have spent years writing this book voluntarily if I was concerned with being well paid for my labours – I wrote it because I felt I had something to say. I’d be unlikely to make much money from traditional publishing anyway - I read an article only last week stating that the average full-time writer earns just £11,000pa, so I wouldn’t be giving up the day job even with a book deal. People getting what I was trying to achieve and appreciating how I’ve gone about it is, to me, a far greater measure of success than amassing wealth or fame. I eventually decided I needed to do what I always end up doing in every area of life (see previous blogs), and go independent.

I’ll confess to being snobby about self publishing in the past. It seemed to me to be nothing more than modernised vanity publishing. Anyone could do it, it didn’t require any recognition or skill, and I didn’t want to see the beloved novel of which I was so proud languishing in undiscovered ebook oblivion among the millions of other wannabes. I would only consider it as a last resort, when all else had failed.

Then I recalled the many tales I’ve heard from traditionally published first-time authors I’ve met over the years of their efforts to promote their debut novels and persuade stores to stock them, with little assistance or budget from their publishers. It often resulted in them remaining largely unknown despite their enviable achievement. It occurred to me that in the end, both routes require the same gamble, as putting the book out there is only half the battle – making it known to potential readers is by far the greater struggle. At least with self publishing, worldwide availability is guaranteed.

Further research proved to me that the book industry is changing. Publishers aren’t spending so much time and money on new authors or producing paperbacks, and more and more novelists are discovered after publishing and promoting themselves. Some are even opting to remain independent, and some that have previously had book deals are going independent by choice. I realised that self publishing would not mean I’d given up on my book, but that I still believed in it despite all the rejections. I also still hope it might be seen by the right people by putting it out into the world, but even if it isn’t scouted by anyone in the industry, I’ll honestly be happy if a few strangers enjoy reading it and leave a nice review, or if it makes just one person think differently.

I was also wrong about it being easy. During the dark days of final preparations, ruthless revisions and tedious formatting that have been the last few weeks of my life, I’d have given anything to have a team of editors, proofreaders, designers and marketing experts behind me. But in the end, doing it all myself only gave me more to be proud of, and allowed me to retain all rights and complete creative control of my work, which are also major positives of indie authorship.

The biggest test of all applied to either publishing method, and that was having the guts to place it at the mercy of the public at all. It’s hard to let go of something that’s been a part of my life for so long. It’s my creation and it contains a lot of me, so in many ways it feels like sending my child (or rather my outcast Frankenstein-esque creature) out to make its own way in the world. I want to set it free and allow it to do the best it can, but I’m also terrified of letting other people anywhere near it and will be most upset if anything bad happens to it. So please take care of it for me. 

It’s strange and complicated, and not to everyone’s taste, but stick with it, and you might just find something interesting hidden beneath the surface. I did say it was like me.

Buy G.O.D. in paperback here: http://www.feedaread.com/books/GOD-9781784079451.aspx

Or buy on kindle here: http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00MBXVWII?*Version*=1&*entries*=0

 (links for all other countries at http://www.shelleyirving.com)

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